A Birth Mother’s Experience
When you Google adoption, all you read about is agencies, adoptive parents and a child. You rarely find anything about a birth mother. After I had made the first and most important decision, life, I had to make the next hardest choice, accepting that I couldn’t provide the life my child deserved. I couldn’t find any guidance for a birth mother.
When I finally contacted an adoption agency, it felt too business like. What about me? How was I to be sure this was the right choice? There was no one to just talk with me. It felt too much like a baby shopping center. I wanted to be able to get to know who was adopting my child, and build a relationship with them. It needed to be more than just what I had read on paper.
I had not made up my mind about open adoption when I first meet Carrie. She was willing to just talk with me and give me insight on how the process works. She actually had my interest at heart. I learned that with an agency, I would sign my rights over to the agency not to the intended parents. There was no guarantee that I’d be able to get to know the selected parents. I didn’t like that. I needed someone. Carrie was that person. You can’t call an agency at 2am in the morning crying. An agency isn’t going to go to every appointment for moral support. The agency, to me, seemed focused solely on the baby. Carrie had the adoptive parents the baby’s and my best interest in mind at all times.
The first thing Carrie asked me was “Why are you making this decision?” She wanted to make sure my reasoning was sound. She explained to me in great detail every angle to the prism of an open adoption. At that time in my life, I felt very alone, lost, and unloved. Carrie and Kristen never pressured me to make the decision to have an open adoption. They did however point out all the positives behind my situation. I was being incredibly selfless, brave, giving, and showing true love. I was in a situation to where I could give a couple a child that they would not be able to have otherwise.
Carrie was by my side every step of the way. In the hospital, she wouldn’t leave my side. She actually slept in the hospital room with me. The team went between me and the adoptive parents and the baby making sure all of us were okay and had what everything we needed at all times 24/7. Technically, the adoptive parents were their clients, but I was never once made to feel that way. It’s not a job to them. It’s not about money. Carrie and her team work out of love. To this day, Carrie still checks on me to see how I am doing, and Kristen is always just a phone call away.
If you are curious about adoption, just aren’t sure what to do or where to start, or just need someone to talk to, give them a call. They are always willing to listen and help in any way they can. I would not have been able to get through this process without them. They are sure to make you feel comfortable, laugh and cry with you and genuinely care about you every step of the way. A grateful birth mother
For my husband and I the adoption process was overwhelming. The endless amount of forms, legal terms and “guard your heart” conversations were enough to make us question how committed we were to this calling to adopt.
However, the Murray Nellis Law Group was our saving grace in this process. Carrie and Kristen came alongside of us to not only provide clarity on the many legal terms and paperwork needed but more importantly they provide us with a personal touch throughout our adoption journey.
The adoption world is flooded with agencies scamming to get your money. We NEVER experienced or felt this with Carrie. She always looked out for us as a client providing us with sound wisdom and guidance. At the same time, she saved us thousands of dollars in legal fees and adoption agency cost.
If it wasn’t for Carrie and her team, our adoption would never have gone through. She truly did save us in many ways. The Adoption Coordinator, Kristen McDougal actually flew out to our son’s birth and provided us with the insight and guidance needed to navigate the hospital dynamics with our birth mother. Kristen and Carrie are the perfect blend of adoption professionals who understand the concerns and desires of adoptive parents and birth parents alike.
My husband and I will always be grateful for the gift Carrie and Kristen provided us. There are a lot of people not worth trusting in the adoption world, but the Murray Nellis Law Group is worth putting your full confidence in. We will use them for all adoption going forward and I hope many reading this will too!The Espy Family
In March of 2014, Carrie’s office called me with news that a baby boy had been born at a local hospital and that his mother and father wanted to make an adoption plan. She asked if we would like to be considered to present our profile book to this birth family, and together we decided to proceed. Ian’s birth parents chose us to be his forever family that day, and after talking with them on the phone, we dropped everything and drove down to meet them at the hospital. Seeing Ian for the first time was surreal – a moment we will never forget. they waited with us as Carrie brought him to us and we cautiously fell in love with him that minute. We spent the morning getting to know his birth parents and promised to love and care for him forever, and to honor the brave decision they made to place him for adoption. We will always celebrate the way he was born into our family through adoption, and cannot thank Carrie and her team enough for making this happen. The Lord used them to minister to Ian’s birth family and through them our dream of becoming parents came true. They truly have a heart for adoption and creating families, while showing unconditional love and support to birth families.
We chose to do cradle care and have Carrie and her team care for Ian during the 10 day revocation period, since after just having a failed match we had to protect our hearts while this adoption was still at risk. We trusted him to their care completely and got constant updates on how he was doing. When the revocation period was up, we were welcomed and celebrated by the team and reunited with our little boy!! Having Ian as our son is worth every hardship we ever faced in our journey to expanding our family. He is God’s gift to us and we were blessed to be able to find him through Carrie and her team at the Murray Nellis Law Group. We would highly recommend them to all prospective adoptive families and birth parents alike because we know how much they truly care for everyone involved. They are now part of the family and we love them very much! The Hall Family